The One Thing Every Special Needs Mom Has in Common

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Jockey. All opinions are 100% mine.

Have you ever been inspired to tell your story? Inspired to show the world what values you truly have underneath? I am honored to partner with Jockey and couldn’t help but fall in love with Jockey’s #ShowEm campaign, which which encourages everyone to show the world what’s truly underneath. Their campaign heroes shared stories of personal trials and how they were able to overcome the obstacles in their paths, relying on important values like family, courage, and perseverance. Their stories personally resonated with me, given my own family’s journey.

Eleven years, two months and 3 days. That is the number of days it took me to finally get my son the diagnosis he deserves. Eleven years. That’s eleven years of feeling completely lost. That’s eleven years of feeling like we were going in circles. That’s eleven years of feeling like I couldn’t help my son. Eleven years. 4,078 days of feeling like I wasn’t doing enough. 583 weeks of fighting for what I knew he deserved. Eleven years… and that’s just the beginning. Funny thing is, even though I know our journey has many more twists and turns ahead of us, I feel confident and more sure of myself than I ever have before. You see, in the last few weeks I’ve come to a very clear revelation about one thing every special needs mom has in common.

The One Thing All Special Needs Moms Have in Common

Our schedule is one that looks very familiar to any special needs family. We have special charts and schedules that break down tasks that others probably take for granted. We have a very detailed schedule that lays out exactly what is happening for the next month. We go to therapy 2 times a week. Then there is the therapy, we, the parents, now have to go to. This doesn’t even count the monthly phsychiatrist visit, the annual neuropsych exams, and the myriad of random visits we have to schedule and attend.

This is our normal.

These are our days.

This is what our life looks like now.

It hasn’t always been this way, though. In fact, it’s been a long exhausting road to get to this point where I can call what we have normal. It used to make me angry and some days, when I forget what all of us special needs mom have in common, I still get angry again. Over the years, I have shared our story in support groups and I have listened to other moms share their stories. No story is exactly the same, with the same characters and the same roadblocks. Yet, every story proves that we all have one thing in common.

The One Thing All Special Needs Moms Have In Common

From the time my son was little I knew he learned differently. Honestly, when he was young I thought the way he learned was absolutely magical. He was advanced beyond his years for his verbal and non-verbal reasoning. The things he said were so insanely clever that they made my head spin. I knew when he started school, we would definitely have to advocate for him to get the services he needed to challenge his mind.

This meant reading about gifted children, joining support groups for my local area to learn about the schools that might be best for him, and taking him to numerous tests to get him into a school we loved. When we showed up to have him tested, we were one in a thousand there. Over a thousand children and only 100 seats in the entire district.

I wanted to give up. However, I couldn’t. My son needed me.

Once my son started the school setting, it was clear that being gifted wasn’t the only difference my son had. He could never sit still, he had difficulty making friends, and he was seen as incredibly “immature.” Many many teachers passed this off as him being a young boy and something he would grow out of. It sent me back to the books, back to the research and back to the support groups.

My son was struggling.

I wanted to give up. However, I couldn’t. My son needed me.

At age six, my son started to have these huge explosive meltdowns that would last hours at a time. The aggression was so severe that many days I wanted to give up. At this point it was no longer strangers that sent judgement my way. Now it was family member, friends, and even my spouse. I started to doubt everything I knew, everything I thought was right about how to be a parent to my child.

My child was still struggling.

I wanted to give up. However, I couldn’t. My son needed me.

Just a year later, I found myself in a room of 10 “professionals” around a long table discussing the supports my child could receive in the public school setting. I learned more about the “IEP” process than I ever cared to, but I knew I had to. I knew if I didn’t learn it, if I didn’t advocate for my child, no one would. Despite all my best efforts, public school did not work out for me or my child. He was struggling. His teachers were struggling.

I was struggling. I wanted to give up.

However, I couldn’t. My son needed me.

We took to homeschooling, chiropractor visits, new doctors, new trials. We tried everything. At first, it seemed to work. It seemed to be better than where we were. In fact, it started to feel like we were getting somewhere “normal.” Little did I know, our life was about to take a turn for the worse. That’s when the frustration set in. The sensory overload. The anxiety. It all became so overwhelming that I started to feel like I was losing my son. I didn’t feel like I was helping him any more. I didn’t feel like he was getting what he needed.

I wanted to give up.

However, I couldn’t. My son needed me.

That’s when I turned to my support groups. I turned to the other special need moms who had been there and done that. What I found was eye opening.

What All Special Needs Moms Have in Common

You see, I was not the first person to struggle. I was not the first mom to want to give up. In fact, I found that we all hit that point. Each and every special needs mom has hit the point where they want to give up.

Yet… they don’t. I didn’t give up. They didn’t give up. You won’t give up.

You know why? Special needs moms have perseverance. The will and strength to keep going when all the walls seem to be crumbling, when all doors seem to be closing and all the roads seem detoured.

The one thing all special needs moms have is perseverance. Each and every one of us get back up when things get hard. We brush off our hurt feelings and our feelings of overwhelm and we get back out there and fight for our kids. Each and every special needs mom hits a dead end and wants to stop traveling.

We want to pack our bags and get off the trail. We yearn to just be “normal.” Then, with a look of our kids eyes, we are reminded just why we are doing this. We are reminded just what we have underneath our tattered clothes.

We have perseverance. We can do this. We can push through. We can go to the next therapy session. We can fight the next fight. We can advocate for our child. We can! We can, because deep down we are all the same. Underneath it all, we have perseverance! And we have each other!

Show Em Perseverence

Create your own captioned photo using the Jockey Showem Meme Generator here and share with the world to #ShowEm what’s underneath! Perseverance is one of the qualities Jockey celebrates in their #ShowEm campaign, and I’m proud to share my own story of perseverance with the world. What values mean the most to you? 

Visit Sponsors Site

For More Adventures in Motherhood

Dear Special Needs Mom Who Wants to Give Up

2 thoughts on “The One Thing Every Special Needs Mom Has in Common”

  1. Pingback: One Life Changing Habit That Will Get You Through Rough Days

  2. This was a such a good read! “No child is alike.” never rang truer than in a special needs moms ear. When special needs moms get together there is usually a bit more understanding if one mom where to say “this worked with Jonny” but the other mom says “Oh, my child can’t stand that!” Yet, from the beginning, we special needs moms learned sometimes we must push, argue, and persuade to get little Jonny needs for his ‘difference’. We need to this and prove we are the expert on each difficulty (many times in black and white). We are busy trying to find ways to help little Johnny with his difficulty. It consumes our days. The ‘difference’ that others don’t understand as well. (My sons differences are what makes him so amazing!). But there is always common ground amoungst special needs moms like you have wrote here:) I think if we embrace the common ground a bit more often, we may find The Village we are always hoping for. Love this! Thank you for sharing:)

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


Scroll to Top