It can happen to the best of us.
We’re only human, after all.
Problems at work. Problems at school. Problems at home. Problems with our children’s behavior or health.
Of course problems are a fact of life, but when they pile on and stress piggybacks with them, it can be a real recipe for becoming weary, burdened, and at the end of your rope. I’ve been there myself more times than I’d like to remember. Some of those times I was able to muster the energy and courage to climb back up the rope. And other times, well, this was my mantra.
“When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.”
1. Keep Going Knots
Sometimes at the end of our ropes, there’s nothing we can do but keep going. At risk of using too many quotes…
“If you’re going through hell, keep going.”
Sometimes we’re feeling weary, but we see our destination ahead. Perhaps it’s a deployment, the end of a school year, the promise of a promotion or job transfer. We don’t think we have it in us and yet, we’ve got to keep going. These are the times when we must get up with our crying child for the 12th time that night. Change the 200th diaper. Respond to (or ignore) yet another tantrum. Even as a tired mom, we must find encouragement because we see the end in sight.
2. Give Up Knots
Then there are the times that beg the question, “Am I doing the right thing here?” And sometimes the answer can be no.
“When things go wrong, don’t go with them.” Elvis Presley
Whether you’re having trouble at your child’s school and know it’s time to remove him. Perhaps it’s family relationships that are so draining you must set firm boundaries and risk hurting those you love. Maybe it’s your 9 to 5 that is sucking the life out of you. Or a too large house with its crushing mortgage. There are times when it’s okay to “quit” things that are not working. To stop doing things that are crushing.
3. Help Me Knots
Then there are times that we need to keep going, need to keep doing the things we’re doing, but we just can’t do it on our own. These come more than we’d like and they force us to ask others for help.
“Be strong enough to stand alone, smart enough to know when you need help, and brave enough to ask for it.”
Certain personality types find it extremely difficult to ask for help. They’ll offer their help to anyone in need, but won’t ask. Maybe you need to ask friends to help you clean the house. Perhaps you ask your support group or church to start a meal plan for your family for one month. Even though you didn’t have a baby and no one passed away. Maybe you ask a friend to fix things in your home so you don’t have to pay. Or you ask your boss for a well deserved raise. Don’t waste precious time hanging, when a quick phone call can relieve you of some burdens.
So when you’re at the end of your rope…
If you are feeling in the trenches of this motherhood thing. Traveling all summer with children who get anxious being in new and different places. Or you are moving and your entire life is a chaotic mess. Or your child is suffering and you just don’t know what else to do to fix it.
Do what you can as good as you can, and then tie a knot and hang on.
If you’re having difficulty redirecting your stress and it’s bubbling into anger that you’re not sure how to handle, my friend Amanda – a mental health counselor – has a series of four FREE videos to help you:
- Know that It’s Possible to Go From Hulk Mama to Peaceful Mama;
- Learn the Real Reason You Blow Up at Your Kids;
- Why Taking a Deep Breath Doesn’t Always Help; and
- How to Stop Feeling Guilty & Worry About Your Anger
I’ve signed up for the free series and am getting so much great information and tis for calming the chaos in my home. Click here to sign up for the Free series today.
Want more In the Moment Plans for Chaos Causing Behaviors or Struggles?
We got you covered.
In our Meltdown Mastery Workshop, we will walk you through how to create your own individualized personalized in the moment plans to deal with the most common (and uncommon) tantrums, meltdowns, and outburst.
This is what we do all day, every day in our huddle membership, is help people create in the moment plans for their biggest Chaos Causers so they can become problem solving partners with their kids.
In this free workshop, you’ll discover:
✔️ How to stay calm even as your child cries, hits, and screams at the top of their lungs using the Stop, Breathe, Anchor technique
✔️ How to uncover what’s really behind the meltdown, tantrum, or outburst using the Behavior Funnel (you’ll know what’s causing it and how to end it quickly)
✔️ What to say and do to help your child to quickly calm down using the 1:1:1 plan (help your child calm down fast without bribes, consequences, or yelling)